Important things a teenager learns.

Around the corner, awaits my 18^th birthday and guess what? I am not ready to be a legal adult yet.

Oh my god! There are so many choices to be made, responsibilities to be assumed and in process a personality to be developed that is absolutely the first step to the dream that is to be achieved. The funny thing is, as much real experience you are going to be bestowed with after crossing that magic number, the journey into your adulthood is guided by your past experiences themselves.

Our experiences from our gullible teenage years wouldn’t seem so helpful; but it was the time when we grew the most and believe me or not I learnt some really important things that I think are worth sharing.

1.       You will be going through various phases in which different music, movies and hobbies would be discovered. Ha! Don’t be let down by your adults calling you inconclusive or continuously chanting “it’s just a phase”. Well hell yeah it’s just a phase. We are finding great things and each time we change our choice, we are learning things about ourselves that we have never learnt before. So go out. Be fickle. You will learn to forgive yourself for those horrible tastes too!

2.       You may not meet ‘the one’ just as fast as your friends claim to do. You might be single all your life *ahem* wondering whether you are meant to die alone. But hey, it’s not your fault you like poetry and want someone who doesn’t think you are crazy. Rather wait than go around dating people who break your heart. Besides you are just 17 with around forever to go. Chill. There are more important dreams and things we got to achieve eh.

3.       Even sitting and staring at the wall might seem appealing some time. You are going to be tired and lazy sometimes, sometimes all the time, and just not doing anything may literally be the best thing in the world. THIS IS THE BEST TIME to watch horror films, lounge around and have time to reflect and ponder. You might realize that ‘you’ and yourself are completely different people.

4.       I learnt to judge character pretty well. That is not the same as judging someone. It’s not the same as being biased and having prejudice. Judging character is a great lesson when it comes to trust and communication. While it protects you from hurt or heartbreak, judging a person deprives you of those amazing opportunities you might have had to meet a great person and learn and inspire from them. So I would rather talk to everybody no matter what others say.

5.       DON’T JUDGE YOURSELF. Stop being completely critical. You aren’t superhuman yet. Infact, allow a room for failure.

6.       We don’t need useless drama in our lives. Delete all toxic relationships. They aren’t worth it.

7.       FOOD! Eat all of it! Try it all! Try it all while you are fearless. I tried sushi and oh my god it’s now my pet love. Same goes for almost all experiences, say yes to everything. (Exceptions, of course) you never know what beautiful experience you might have.

8.       Love your body. Whether you are a girl or a boy. Not all of us have amazing metabolisms or flawless skins and shiny hair that falls in cresses. But it’s okay, our scars are skin stars and your curves and body is your temple to cherish and love. Don’t let those judgmental...people... tell you who you are. Meh who cares anyway.

9.       Kindness. Being kind reaps the most happiness. You don’t need to be a philanthropist to show how much you care but small acts or gestures are enough to change someone’s life and yours too. And really, you need to start with your friends and family first.

10.   I was afraid of change, too set in my own ways. But recently I realized nothing grows in the comfort zone. I would rather voice my opinions and be unapologetically myself than regret the things I never said or did. Time anyway doesn’t run backwards.

11.   Parents might get annoying as hell. Even grandparents. But when they leave you, you miss their banter and even their taunts. Anyway, it’s difficult to stay mad at them for too long. (I love my mom’s cooking too much). Thus! Love them and tell them so. You would rather do it now than have what ifs in your life later.

12.   I might sound weird but being a teenager means learning to have integrity and discipline too. Class doesn’t come when you earn and become a rich person, but it comes through character and behavior. When is the best time to develop it than now?

13.   It’s fun making before and after pictures.

14.   Social media isn’t everything. It’s the most antisocial thing I have known.

15.   Learn to take criticism well. It’s a gift too. Some people are just critical but some are merely stating what they see.

16.   Enjoy every minute of this time. Eventually you will know what true happiness is. Hang in there. Giving up will take away all the great chances.

This list is by no means exhaustive. But hey, sleep is important. Anyway. These are my learnings, all our experiences would be different. But wherever you are its important to know there will be very few real people who will have genuine concern for you. Thus love, live and let live. And wish me luck for my soon to be found adult hood.

Ps: I am scared.

Writers note: It’s more than a year or two since I have this blog and I’m glad m reaching out to many people now. In US, Germany, Dubai, Singapore and more. IT EXCITES ME REALLY! I’m grateful for all the time you take out to read my work. Thank you for your genuine comments and opinions. Please continue to find and express yourself here, it keeps me going! J

Ohel David Synagogue. Pune.

In the scorching heat of the sun, a stout old man wobbled towards my mother and me as we waited outside the synagogue. Like many I didn’t have any idea till a past few days what a synagogue is. Figuring it to be a Jewish worship place, it made me question the very existence of Jews in Mumbai and Pune; were the numbers so few that I had no idea that they had temples and committees of their own?

“Where are you from?” asked the skeptical caretaker with a policeman standing not far away. “Mumbai.” was our feeble reply to the questioning eyes of the man. In the dreadful moment of realization, it came to me that we wouldn’t be allowed into the old temple if we weren’t Jewish. After a series of questions about our visit and our interest in the building, the kind old man turned and waved us to come in. The smiling cleaner stood by the gate happy to see visitors even though we were no worshippers.

The gothic red building stood tall in front of me. I felt as small yet peaceful in the shade of the tall pointed turrets and pointed domes that encompassed tales of the Jewish history, the promises of their marriages and the smoke of the holy words from their Torah.

Built by David Sassoon, the structure still stood untouched as if the gods had themselves blessed it. A small chapel like grey building with a triangular entrance and grotesque carvings on the side minarets housed the body of the late David Sassoon.

The area of the synagogue or known as the “Lal deval” amongst the locals, has the power to take you back in time. With not much history connected to it, a story is yet narrated of how the 8 Jewish families in total in Mumbai and Pune come to listen to the holy words from the books with men and women sitting separately, lulled by the lullaby of the Ten Commandments and the divine words narrated by their Moses.

I learnt that nobody other than a Jew was allowed for religious reasons, but yet without any resentment at heart or any hatred towards any other religion, us as Hindus were allowed inside with the faith in us that we come in respect and peace; this in itself is a message of the need of desperate rebirth of the fading harmony amongst all the different “dhramas” in India.

The building was completely empty save its caretakers and police men. No man was praying or no child skipped around running his hands across the red brick walls. But supposedly a wedding that occurred on the last Sunday was a picture completely different from this. The gates were opened to everyone, the hall of prayer was filled with laughter and varied conversations. People cheered as a cup and the rings were placed in boxes and in a one and a half hour wedding ceremony, families were joined, and the man and wife were bonded together into one person, into one soul.

To my foolish curiosity I learnt the tradition of smashing cups at the end of the wedding ceremony only occurs in Israel. My lack of understanding of the rituals might have offended the caretaker a little.

My jaw dropped when the doors to the inside were opened for I had never seen anything so beautiful in my life. The painted windows colored the sunlight in various hues of red, blue and yellow illuminating the marble floor. The empty benches were lined at the side of the hall, in the center a stage, caged and clothed in blue velvet. At the far end of the hall was draped a red velvet curtain with a silver star with the Ten Commandments engraved in marble; in English and Hebrew, on the pillars at the side.

The balcony was lined with wooden fences and the same colored window decorated each wall. The golden chandeliers, without a speck of dust, hung from the high ceiling of the room. I couldn’t help but feel devotion and helpless in this divine place of the Jewish.

It was clear that which every stage of worship one visits, the devotion and love they feel, is the same; serene and purifying.

After a little wandering and pestering the caretaker with questions, we took our leave. Giving my thanks, I saw the cleaner smiling broadly and waving as I turned to take one last look at the red building hoping that I can visit again and meet the Jewish worshippers who managed to keep their roots and hold the teachings of their holy Torah in their heart without any complain towards the ignorance towards Jews in Maharashtra.